The secret of surviving in a new culture is the ability to find an inner peace with the way things operate. The difficulty in doing so is having to abandon some of the core principles of one's own culture. I offer the example of cutting in line. In the United States, this is seriously frowned upon. In Costa Rica, however, it is done very casually. Often, people will coyly ask to cut in when they have fewer things to purchase than you, and other times they just move right in. I have had to work at accepting something I consider to be very rude. I've learned to offer the courtesy first, to accept it when offered to me and, at times, judge when I have already waited my fair turn, and suggest that they do as well. Inner peace squared.
It does happen, every so often, that the inner peace gets off kilter. The other day the store was loaded with people, even the 10 or less lane was open. I had a full cart, a tired kid and someone had already cut in front of a woman ahead of me. When it finally came my turn, a man stepped in front of me and handed the cashier a small bottle of vodka. My inner peace drifted away. Greatly offended, I proceeded to tell the man that he was very rude to cut in front of me without even asking, and that doing so was an act completely devoid of etiquette . No one really said anything, there was not even a gesture that perhaps folks buying vodka should wait with the rest of us. Aside from feeling pretty great about my Spanish, I got nothing from the moment.
No matter how well adjusted I think I am to life here, certain instances reveal how deeply my own culture is ingrained in me. Speaking out against any sort of injustice is not a Costa Rican thing to do. Oddly enough, my five years here have made me a much more assertive person. As for the inner peace, I think I have found a bit more of that as well. A new cultural environment can bring out all sorts of qualities one never knew were stored away inside. Maybe the brush with a less passive culture did something to the guy with the vodka as well. I doubt that he has more inner peace from it, but hey, you never know.
3 comments:
Good for you! Isn't it funny that however unsettling moving from place to place is in the short run, in the long run it can actually result in that calm 'ommmm' space. All is good. Cheers to the Vodka guy, may his head spin forever!
ha! i can so relate, however the british are infamous for their ability to "queue". after a taste of this culture, i wonder how i would ever tolerate someone cutting in! perhaps a few years in costa rica are in order.
didn't mean to post that as Reilly, it's me! Becca
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